Captivated

Before reading, please note: when I start writing these my intention is not to actually address my readers because I want these to be more reflections from my heart, however I’m gonna break that unspoken rule today.

I want so badly to be captivated by, in love with and consumed for my Lord Jesus; I can never seem to wrap my head around this concept though. I have this huge road block in my head that doesn’t allow me to make a clear connection between what these actions look like when manifested in my life. I know that when you’re in love with someone you’ll do crazy things that don’t make sense to other people and I guess the same would be true of being in love with Jesus so much that it makes you appear crazy to other people. Imagine how much this concept is magnified though when talking about God.

After an honest evaluation of my heart though, I know that I’m not living crazily for Christ. I guess you’d probably describe my lifestyle as more of a fondness or affinity for God. I actually don’t even know if that’s accurate. If you’re reading this, take a look at your own life be very honest with yourself. How often do you think about God in a day? Even better, how many times in a day do you deny yourself a selfish desire so that God’s will for your life may be honored? I know that our relationship with God doesn’t come down to numbers and statistics but I am trying to get you to look at your heart in an objective way rather than rationalizing your way out of this. I do the same thing—I’m not that bad of a person you know? I’m usually nice to people, even first thing in the morning, and I only gossip on occasion. See, that’s exactly what I’m talking about. I’m always letting myself off the hook because I place a cap on my ability to live for God based on worldly benchmarks. I hate that about myself. I know the only judgment that matters is God’s so I should only evaluate my heart in light of that knowledge.

After evaluating your heart, think about what you’re doing that might illustrate your passion and zeal for God. Is your life an unmistakable portrait of a God-centered life? Sometimes? Only on Sundays? Our lives aren't meant to be lived in a compartmentalized fashion where we only chase after God with abandon when it’s convenient. At the very core of who we are, we've been designed to live a pure life in pursuit of God’s purpose for our lives. I know that our lives are not about “doing” enough for God but on the other hand, think about how you are honoring God’s love and sacrifice that he patiently, persistently and consistently showers upon your life.

I pray for your passion, your heart and your unquenchable thirst for God’s living and breathing word. Run after him….even if you don’t know what it looks like. If you’ve even the slightest glance of God you’ll know that He’ll be tickled if you do because He knows your heart.